Does My Toddler Hate Me?

A toddler’s life is a very black and white area. They don’t know gray. They don’t know the sentence, “I am not ready to talk right now.” It is “Love” or “Hate”.
 
As an adult, if we need some privacy, we can say it directly. It doesn’t mean that we hate someone, it just means that we are not ready to talk to them.
 
If a toddler is busy looking at something or isn’t feeling well, they might not want to be near you.
 
You might think that they hate you, but they don’t. They are only trying to communicate it by not looking at you or by crying when you try to pick them up.
 
If you think your toddler hates you, you are in the right place on the internet.
 
In this article, let’s discuss various key factors about why a toddler ‘hates‘ you.

Has Your Toddler Said, “I Hate You”?

There are mainly two ways your toddler can show that they hate you.

1. Toddler said I Hate You

A toddler’s stage is a learning stage. They speak what they see and learn.

Does anyone in a toddler’s circle use the word ‘Hate’? Especially parents, friends, people from their daycare, or their playdate.

It is not wrong to use the H-word, but the toddler doesn’t know the power of this word.

They may associate hate with something as simple as ‘Dislike’.

2. Toddler Showed They Hate You

If your toddler is not ‘in the mood’, they might have a ‘stink’ face that clearly says, “do not enter”.

This doesn’t clearly mean that they hate you.

They just need some time to understand what exactly they are feeling.

Why Does Your Toddler Hate You?

There are many answers to this question.

Let’s try to understand why your toddler ‘hates’ you.

I’ve also mentioned a few solutions to every point.

1. Is Your Toddler Hungry?

Even as adults, we get cranky whenever we are hungry. In a matter of time, the hunger turns into a hanger.

The same rule might apply to your toddler, too.

Even if your toddler has an eating schedule, try giving some fruits to them. This will be enough to keep their small stomach satisfied till meal time.

2. Do They Like What They Are Eating?

As a parent, we try to introduce as many new food items as we can. Sometimes, the toddler likes it and sometimes they just don’t.

You can either change the food or wait for a few minutes to re-introduce it to them.

A child is always interested in what their parents are eating. I’d suggest you eat the same thing you are feeding your toddler. If they see you try it, they might try it as well.

3. Are They Full?

Every child is different. If the internet says that your child needs 100grams to fill his stomach, you should know that it’s the ‘average’ value, not the exact value.

Nobody knows how much the child wants to eat more than themselves. Stop feeding them forcefully when they say that they are full.

If you are concerned that they might be hungry, try feeding them again after an hour.

This way you are making your child independent to take their own decisions, and feeding them properly.

4. Are You Tired or Cranky?

Toddlers can sense their parent’s moods quite easily.

If they see that you are cranky, they will try to have a safe distance from you.

Don’t worry, try to take a break and reassure your child that you are fine.

5. Did You Scold Them?

Whenever parents scold their children, the kids try to be more careful around them.

This might be a reason they are not communicating with you properly, or giving you a gloomy face. Try explaining the reason you scolded them.

6. Do You Spend More Time With Them?

If you spend more time with your toddler than your spouse does, your child might show more enthusiasm for meeting them.

This may cause you to believe that they hate you and love your spouse more. It is not the case; they are just excited to see a new face.

Think of it as 3:1. They showed an equal amount of their love on you in 3 parts and on your spouse in 1 part. That 1 part can look like a lot to you, but it is an equal amount of love.

7. Did They Call Someone Else Mama?

It is quite normal for your toddler to call someone else, especially their teacher, ‘Mama’. This doesn’t mean that they don’t like you as their mom.

Toddlers learn a new word and they try to use it for everybody.

8. Did They Say Dada First?

If you are a mom who spends more time with your child, the first word ‘Dada’ might sting a little to you.

The toddler goes through various phases where sometimes they are more connected with the other parent.

9. Are You Strict With Their Schedules?

As a mother, you want to do everything ‘perfectly’. You try to do everything on time–feeding, bathing, napping, reading, and playtime.

As toddlers’ body is constantly changing, they might get bored with the regular schedule.

Try to make their schedule a bit more flexible and if they don’t want to do something, don’t force them.

This will create a safe environment for them to learn new things and be more connected to you.

What Can You Do To Stop This Feeling?

Yes, there are going to be many days when you feel your toddler hates you.

There will be many days when you are going to question everything that you do. But there will also be days when you will feel the love pouring out of your toddler for you.

1. Maintain A Diary

I’d suggest you have a baby diary and write all those sunshine moments with your toddler.

Record everything, and whenever you feel low, look at those recordings and remind yourself that this is just a phase.

Your toddler loves you, Mama.

2. Talk To Someone

It is not good for your mental health to have these emotions bottled up. You should talk to someone about it.

You can talk to your partner, your friend, or your family members. I’d suggest talking to your spouse, or a mother who understands what you feel might help you.

Read Next:

– I Hit My Toddler And I Feel Bad – What Can I Do?
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– Is Activia Yogurt Safe For A Toddler?
– Why Do Babies Stare At Me?
– Can Babies Have Jello?

Wrapping It Up!

Some days will be stormy, and others will be full of sunshine.

Try doing some fun activities with your toddler. Go to their favorite park or play with their favorite toy. During bedtime, Read the story they like the most.

Let them join you in household chores. Enjoy your time together.